Twelve Alternatives to Lashing Out at Your Child

I always expected to adore my children. I had visions of cooing over every cute look and phrase they uttered. We’d spend the day walking hand in hand down the beach and later cuddle over book in front of the fire. What I didn’t expect was the tears and screams- theirs and mine. What I didn’t expect was to clasp my hands in desperation and pray fiercely for patience. And when that doesn’t work, I hide in the bathroom, taking deep breaths before they come banging on the door.

In the spirit of Child Abuse Prevention Month, may you find your coping mechanism. Here are some tips.

1. Take a deep breath... and another. Then remember you are the adult. Children are little and look to you for guidance.

2. Close your eyes and imagine you're hearing what your child is about to hear. This can stop you cold.

3. Press your lips together and count to 10... or better yet, to 20.

4. Put your child in a time-out chair (remember this rule: one time-out minute for each year of age.)

5. Put yourself in a time-out chair. Think about why you are angry: is it your child, or is

your child simply a convenient target for your anger?

6. Phone a friend. It helps just to say, I’m going crazy!! My friends laugh and remind me that this too shall pass.

7. If someone can watch the children, go outside and take a walk. My husband and I will take turns giving each other a break.

8. Take a hot bath or splash cold water on your face.

9. Hug a pillow.

10. Turn on some music. Sometimes it drowns out the screaming!

11. Pick up a pencil and write down as many helpful words as you can think of. Post it on the refrigerator and refer to it often.

12. Admit to you child that you need some space. I say this a lot and amazingly it works… sometimes.

Adapted from the website: Prevent Child Abuse America.

Hmph!